"As you come to recognize the power of your consciousness, that what is behind your eyes, so to speak, holds more power than what appears in front of them, your inner and outer perceptions change. You cannot become compassionate with yourself without becoming compassionate with others, or with others without becoming compassionate with yourself. When you are compassionate with yourself and others, your world becomes compassionate. You draw to yourself other souls of like frequency, and with them you create, through your intentions and your actions and your interactions, a compassionate world. 

"As you come to seek and see the virtues and strengths and nobilities of others, you begin to seek and see them in yourself also. As you draw to yourself the highest-frequency currents of each situation, you radiate that frequency of consciousness, and change the situation. You become more and more and more consciously a being of Light." -Gary Zukav, The Seat of the Soul

Happy March, my friends! It certainly has been a busy last three months, filled with meeting hundreds of new faces and friends alongside several personal and professional changes. While I am far from stopping my Music & Memory series for this year, I thought it best take a moment to send out an invitation to share with your St. Louis friends for April (more libraries to come in August).  

While I have been the primary speaker at these presentations, it has been my pleasure to learn from the fine human beings sitting before me who seem to genuinely connect with the content. Shared stories always creates an opportunity to infuse a memorable and meaningful form of compassion amongst the groups, and posed questions are as intriguing as ever. One anecdote begets the next, and it is a true joy to synergize the energy of our collective experiences across the room. I am both awed and in awe of the people who opt to seek information on a topic under the radar, but one so crucial in its' perpetual advocacy for maintaining Arts education in our schools. Seeking meaningful ways to connect with our loved ones through music, when words and all else fails, is absolutely invaluable to any societal structure. And, if you are a musician, please join us this spring in sharing your gifts with those who need it the most! Join Team Musicians for Memories by playing or singing with your groups at a local assisted living facility! #musiciansformemories

While I am fortunate to continue this advocacy work on behalf of the Alzheimer's Association, I am currently searching for a new publisher who will support and propel my mission by printing IF MUSIC BE THE FOOD OF LOVE. If you currently have a copy of the work, please hang on to your first edition! A second edition may be on the way from a company who understands the vision for how this special historical fiction can help so many affected by Alzheimer's Disease. 

In the meantime, I hope you stay tuned to future quarterly blogs to stay up to date with current research on practices for using a prescribed music repertoire to help your loved ones gain access to lucidity, if only for moments. See you in June!

#musiciansformemories #EndAlz #musicians #musicadvocacy #ArtsEducation #musiceducators #musicandmemory #musicforall #SLCO #StLouis #musictherapy 

"When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel." -Eleanor Brownn, Author & Speaker

No, I'm not done writing or being an author! Quite the contrary, it's simply time to redirect my efforts to the flip-side of my mission in educating our community on the power of music and memory in the brain. Once again, I'm ecstatic to continue the Music & Memory series at our local St. Louis County Libraries, and will be representing the St. Louis Chapter of the Alzheimer's Association in every engagement as well. I humbly appreciate your support and would love to see you at one of 12 presentations throughout the St. Louis area. You are welcome to share this event with friends, family, co-workers, and the like who may need to hear about helping their loved ones through music. 

During these next few months, my return to research and drafting of Play On (sequel to IF MUSIC BE THE FOOD OF LOVE) will also be a top priority. I will only post quarterly from now on, but may revisit several key blogs if relevant. 

Again, I want to thank everyone for your unwavering support, and ask that you continue to create, shape, and share your life's playlists with those you love, as one never knows when they might need it most in the future. 

Musically Yours,
Denise

@ElamDauw @slcl @ALZSTL @musicians @musiceducators #musicandmemory #EndAlz #stlouiscountylibrary #musiceducators #caregivers #musicians #alzheimers #dementia #musicandthebrain #StLouis #StLouisCountyLibrary #StLouisCityLibrary #StCharlesLibrary #StLouisBusinessMagazine #StLouisBusinessJournal #StLouisEducators #StLouisRadio #StLouisNews #StLouisLocal

November is a time to reflect on gratitude for many, and the blessings I've been fortunate to encounter are plentiful. While I wrap my head around all the doors and opportunities afforded to me over the last 6 years on my journey, I cannot help thinking how it all started with one word: Grief. My family watched an amazing human being deteriorate for over 10 years from a disease which still has no cure, no treatment, nor means for slowing down. Music was a common bond among our family, but an afternoon's experience singing at her hospital bedside provided an epiphany and personal mission worthy of discussion and awareness. I am exceedingly thankful for what that enlightening revelation has brought about in my life personally, but also how it has shaped my mission to educate people everywhere on the power of music in the brain, provide a scientific foundation for how we are always able to respond to music, and provide caregivers with ideas for a prescribed repertoire for their loved ones. To quote the lyrics of Bernie Taupin and Elton John, "I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do..." 

From my grandmother's loss, I became hopeful of making a difference beyond my role on the podium as a music educator. An incredibly intelligent person, let's call him Hemingway, once instructed us: "All you have to do is write one true sentence. Write the truest sentence that you know," which is what I decided to do from my own grief. Speaking with family, interviewing doctors, and pouring myself into countless hours of Alzheimer's research created the best opportunity to make a difference in the most commercial way possible. My goal was to spread awareness through a historical romantic fiction, but little did I know where my efforts would eventually lead me when the novel was finished. 

From the time my first full draft was printed and during months of peer editing in 2012, my liaison with the Alzheimer's Association - St. Louis Chapter started solidifying. Every encounter with the professional staff was remarkable, and the kindness shown to me from the beginning was stellar. One introduction led to another, including several of the world's leading experts in Alzheimer's Disease research and renown neurologists (resumes too long to list). Dr. John Morris and Dr. Randall Bateman assisted in affirming a scientifically sound plot line, and informants of various details were Dr. Eric Reiman, Dr. David Holtzman, and Dr. David Carr to name a few. My goal all the while was to stay abreast of all updates, scientific research, and developments that could impact the validity of my story while waiting for publication, and it remains relevant today as a proud volunteer. 

​​To this point, I never expected to engage as a volunteer with the Alzheimer's Association in the way I have over the past several years. From a Young Ambassador, to Walk to End Alzheimer's Team Captain, to The Longest Day Team Captain, to music meet-up volunteer, to new AACE (Community Educator), to Music & Memory speaker, I am exceedingly proud, humbled, and honored to be a part of an organization that works tirelessly to eliminate this disease. With every moment and each effort to raise funds toward research and awareness, we are inching closer to a world without Alzheimer's. 

While I have a great deal of love and thanks for those who have helped from the Alzheimer's Association, I also need to thank the countless members of the St. Louis Writer's Guild, The Writer's of St. Charles, The Writer's Lens, local bookstores, markets, and businesses, among numerous other community members for shining a great deal of light on my mission, the novel, and Music & Memory work. I cannot thank each of you individually, but I am humbled beyond words to have become your friend through the literary world, through our musicianship and/or educator roles, or by word of mouth means. The support and care you all have shown has been sincerely invaluable, and I can't begin to convey my appreciation. 

I've been fortunate to personally meet wonderful people (thousands by now), celebrities included, who have listened, heard my mission, and spoken with me about their own experiences with Alzheimer's, but I am most proud how my district, my school, and my students have personally tapped into how powerful music can be for those who need it most. These students selflessness and willingness to volunteer to play music for those with dementia has brought as much extrinsic reward to others as it has intrinsically enhanced their own hearts. I am exceedingly happy to provide a continual mission of hope through The Longest Day campaign with Team Musicians for Memories! #musiciansformemories

While I've maintained an overwhelmingly busy professional life the past decade without regret on that front, it has come at great personal costs, and it is time to step back as I dive into presenting more Music & Memory lectures this winter at a dozen St. Louis County Libraries. December 2016 will wrap up over two and a half years of solid monthly blogging for which I am proud; however, I am committed to a quarterly entry as I begin focus on the sequel to If Music Be the Food of Love entitled, Play On. 

I want to thank the hundreds of return readers, who eagerly await the end of the month to catch the latest writing. Your support has meant the world to me. Check back in December for information on upcoming lecture series dates, or visit the EVENTS tab for more information. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!! 

#EndAlz #musicians #musiceducators #musicandmemory #IfMusicBeTheFoodofLove #authors #StLouisWritersGuild #WritersofStCharles #StLouis #StLouisCountyLibrary #StLouisCityLibrary #StCharlesLibrary #caregivers #Alzheimers #AlzheimersAssociation #AllWriteFestival #MozingoMusic #DreamHouseandTeaRoom #ParcProvence #Bethesda #Westview #Brookdale #FountainsofWestCounty #RotaryClubofStLouis #WomensEthicalSociety #StLouisBusinessMagazine #StLouisBusinessJournal #StLouisEducators #Rockwood #BarnesandNoble #StLouisMarkets #MusicandtheBrain #WritersLens #Publishing #Screenwriters #StLouisRadio #StLouisNews #StLouisLocal

“Music is so naturally united with us that we cannot be free from it even if we so desired.” –Boethius
 
Why do we need music? In analyzing music to the function of society, Darwin wrote, “As neither the enjoyment nor the capacity of producing musical notes are faculties of the least use to man… they must be ranked among the most mysterious with which he is endowed.”
 
Regarding survival necessities, Steven Pinker said where “biological cause and effect are concerned, music is useless… It could vanish from our species and the rest of our lifestyle would be virtually unchanged.” Concerning the lack of adaptive function of the arts, “They may be by-products of two other traits: motivational systems that give us pleasure when we experience signals that correlate with adaptive outcomes (safety, sex, esteem, information-rich environments), and the technological know-how to create purified and concentrated doses of these signals,” Pinker notes.  
 
Despite our lack of need for music, it remains a fundamental, vital, and pivotal feature to human beings in every culture. We can all sense musical features as our brains are hardwired to work muscles in every cortex, region, and sub-region due to how it is processed. It promotes activity unlike any other human experience, from analyzing beat patterns, tempo, melodic phrases, oscillations, to recognizing complex patterns, repetitions, timbres, sequences, et cetera. Our auditory and nervous systems are equipped naturally with the circuitry to perceive music and create both a logical and emotional response. Because of our desire to be stimulated in this complex way, we yearn for a connection to music inherently, and will go to great lengths to find it and be a part of the listening experience. It has the power to stir imagery, to elicit memories, and forge bonds between individuals in meaningful ways. 

​How do you grow musically? As with any other language, the brain seeks to decode exposure through acculturation and form the synapse connections necessary to communicate with other human beings. The same is true for musicians. Because music is in a constant state of evolution, performers and teachers alike tend to feel a natural pull toward those who may enhance their vocabulary and understanding for music as a language. Absorbing new information to enhance skill development, from either a technical or musically aesthetic perspective, will be an innate passion for those who accept the evolution of our culture and society’s preferences for music. Even the common populous, while not highly educated in music pedagogy, seeks to find others who share similar tastes in music preferences. Relationships are forged when comfort is found as consumers of like-music who enjoy the same live performance settings. Why? Our limbic systems, where we process emotions, are wired in a similar capacity, which draws us closer together in a faster, more meaningful way.
 
Exposing our daily lives to other musicians can feed our soul in ways we never imagined. The conversations that lead to personal and musical growth can end up becoming the most momentous, critical, and direction changing exchanges of our lives.
 
Do you share best practices with your music peers?
The evolution of humanity must coincide with growth as musicians (especially educators). We are all practicing educators and musicians; therefore, we do not have every answer, and we certainly must yield to the changing times in every element of exposure to education and in music. If we refuse to evolve, set higher expectations, and new goals for technique and pedagogy, then we cannot continue to communicate music in an open, honest way.
 
Do you discuss pedagogy?
Technique and music aesthetics pedagogy are two polar opposites.
 
Regarding technique, sharing your experiences with those who play your instrument verses discussing topics with non-like instrumentalists can be just as rewarding. Eyes can be opened to trying various equipment or preferred brands you may have avoided earlier in your career, and depending on the style of music performed, can end up changing the complete sound of the music itself. For non-like instrumentalist or vocalist concepts, new perspectives can be gained by simply listening to musician’s thoughts that typically experience the ensemble setting from an opposing side.
 
When considering aesthetics, an entire world of possibilities can be opened up by remembering one thing: “Soulful human beings create profound music, regardless of their level of musical achievement. Such music is, at the same time, honest and direct, and speaks in the most direct way to all that hear it.” –James Jordan
 
As mentioned in previous blogs, musicians are often held up by the technical, when honest music is authentically made up of the trust and belief of oneself and others, and love of self. Vulnerability of expression is the only way to make music, alone or with others. One must choose love over every other emotion whenever the baton, the instrument, or the voice is lifted to perform; otherwise, humanity in the sound is absent all together.
 
Are you a connoisseur and consumer of music?
Being an excellent musician does not always necessitate you actually taking the stage to learn. Professional conferences, concerts, operas, and special live musical events are where one may learn the best performance techniques. Watch, listen, and absorb! Whether inferior to your own skill-set, something positive can be taken away from every musician. Listen, and listen more to build a better understanding of quality and non-quality performances, which includes soulful musicianship.
 
Are you willing to evolve?
Because vulnerable performances must stem from love of self and others, being a quality musician also indicates you are an upstanding individual. From personal experience, one cannot possibly appreciate a musical product when the individuals creating said performance are not kind, respectful, nor do they care how their performances are perceived. In reference to Mr. Jordan’s quote above, we are in the business of human aesthetics, and creating great music requires an established, meaningful connection with your ensemble and your audience. The truth remains that ‘people don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care,’ and the same principle rings true for performing artists.
 
Being a respectful, humble learner in all facets of musicianship allows for more growth, even when you learn what NOT to do from other musicians. Likewise, avoid allowing others to influence your understanding of fellow musicians, ensembles, or pedagogical ideals until you have met, witnessed, or tried certain ways for yourself.  However, beware of preconceived notions as well. For example, ratings at state contests are not always indicative of a well-rounded music education being facilitated in appropriate ways within a program. These performances are simply snapshots of student learning over 2-3 selections, and not a representation of the teaching going on outside those selections.
 
Finally, what one may deem as “failures” may end up fueling the finest successes of our lives; therefore, keeping an optimistic 'uplook' (as opposed to outlook) is crucial to understanding that berating oneself for mistakes is pointless and irrelevant. Miles Davis said, “In improvisation, there are no mistakes,” and is that not the point? We are all improvising at life, and to deem a single error as a “failure” is a false sense of inferiority when change is inevitable to avoid the same issue later. To remain stagnant is the greatest mistake of all; therefore, we evolve with an open spirit and a passionate, eager, and brave heart!

A special thank you to Mr. Joseph Gilbert, for his enduring and unwavering companionship (and musicianship) the last 3+ years to provide feedback for this blog. Many beverages, dinners, visits, and discussions later, we continue to evolve and grow, and ours has been one of the most significant friendships of my life. Thank you, Joe.  

#musicians #musiceducators #performers #honestmusicianship #band #orchestra #choir #musicteachers 

For those of you who are late to the blog party, I wanted to take a moment to categorize and highlight topics that may be of relevance. Maybe a particular month was missed, or curiosity on a specific subject is more prevalent than before. Regardless, navigating the information is easier now and I encourage you to seek out information on whichever topic may be of importance at this time.
 
My deepest and utmost gratitude to the hundreds of people who check in at the end of every month to read (and hopefully be inspired by) what I have to share. Alzheimer’s Disease is a growing epidemic that will not subside, has no survivors, will not slow down, has no treatments, and no cure. Alongside my goal to spread awareness of Alzheimer’s since the publication of IF MUSIC BE THE FOOD OF LOVE, has been my mission to help musicians understand their superpower, the science behind music in the brain, the role of music in memory, and enable a willingness to listen to the call to serve the greater community by using musical gifts and talents. Through music therapy themes, techniques were provided to further assist caregivers in their approach to helping nurture loved ones at home through a prescribed repertoire. Another goal has been encouraging inward reflection in personal approaches to teaching, music education, performing music, and advocacy by revealing approaches to honest music making, teaching, and overall musicianship. 

Stay tuned for information on 12 Music & Memory presentations at branches all over St. Louis County this winter! (Locations here: www.denise-elam-dauw.com/events)

Click on the archives to the right to view topics of interest. Thank you so much for reading and all your support! 

​Alzheimer’s Disease & Advocacy
September 2014 – Alzheimer’s Awareness
January 2015 – Tick-Tock…
February 2015 - #StillAlice
March 2015 – The Longest Day
July 2015 – Music & Memory: A Gateway to Lucidity
August 2015 – Walk On…
November 2015 – Have a Brain? …You’re at Risk
March 2016 – Musicians for Memories #musiciansformemories
June 2016 – Alzheimer’s & Brain Awareness Month
 
Dementia Related Music Therapy Themes
November 2014 – Where Words [and all other options] Fail, Music Speaks…
March 2015 – The Longest Day
April 2015 – Proof
July 2015 – Music & Memory: A Gateway to Lucidity
September 2015 – A Tribute to Dr. Oliver Sacks
October 2015 – Life’s Spiral for Musicians
December 2015 – Emotional Responses to Music
January 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
February 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
March 2016 – Musicians for Memories #musiciansformemories
August 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love (Through Music), Part 2
 
For Music Educators, Performers, & Advocates
November 2014 – Where Words [and all other options] Fail, Music Speaks…
December 2014 – The Microwave Norm Phenomenon
March 2015 – The Longest Day
April 2015 – Proof
May 2015 – Honest Musicianship
June 2015 – Nature v. Nurture
July 2015 – Music & Memory: A Gateway to Lucidity
September 2015 – A Tribute to Dr. Oliver Sacks
October 2015 – Life’s Spiral for Musicians
December 2015 – Emotional Responses to Music
January 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
February 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
March 2016 – Musicians for Memories #musiciansformemories
May 2016 – In Pursuit of Truth: Education & Performance
July 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love, Part 1
August 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love (Through Music), Part 2
 
For Educators
May 2014 – Heroic Teachers
July 2014 – The Call to Serve
August 2014 – The Lucky One
December 2014 – The Microwave Norm Phenomenon
June 2015 – Nature v. Nurture
October 2015 – Life’s Spiral for Musicians
May 2016 – In Pursuit of Truth: Education & Performance
July 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love, Part 1
 
For General Inspiration & Mission Philosophy
April 2014 – Music: A Gateway to Lucidity (A Short Story)
July 2014 – The Call to Serve
October 2014 – Loss
April 2015 – Proof
June 2015 – Nature v. Nurture
July 2015 – Music & Memory: A Gateway to Lucidity
September 2015 – A Tribute to Dr. Oliver Sacks
March 2016 – Musicians for Memories #musiciansformemories
April 2016 – Anniversary Blog!
 
A Complete Index
April 2014 – Music: A Gateway to Lucidity (A Short Story)
May 2014 – Heroic Teachers
July 2014 – The Call to Serve
August 2014 – The Lucky One
September 2014 – Alzheimer’s Awareness
October 2014 – Loss
November 2014 – Where Words [and all other options] Fail, Music Speaks…
December 2014 – The Microwave Norm Phenomenon
January 2015 – Tick-Tock…
February 2015 - #StillAlice
March 2015 – The Longest Day
April 2015 – Proof
May 2015 – Honest Musicianship
June 2015 – Nature v. Nurture
July 2015 – Music & Memory: A Gateway to Lucidity
August 2015 – Walk On…
September 2015 – A Tribute to Dr. Oliver Sacks
October 2015 – Life’s Spiral for Musicians
November 2015 – Have a Brain? …You’re at Risk
December 2015 – Emotional Responses to Music
January 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
February 2016 – Music: The Superpower, Part 1
March 2016 – Musicians for Memories #musiciansformemories
April 2016 – Anniversary Blog!
May 2016 – In Pursuit of Truth: Education & Performance
June 2016 – Alzheimer’s & Brain Awareness Month
July 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love, Part 1
August 2016 – Shedding Fear & Enabling Love (Through Music), Part 2

#EndAlz #alzheimers #dementia #musicians #musiceducators #performers #musictherapy #musicandmemory #educators #musicadvocacy

​“We simply have to do a better job speaking to our students, learning who they are at their cores, and genuinely care more about their progress as young people. We must stop hiding from our own stories and choose to share the vulnerability that makes us all human beings. All musicians and directors should try to perform music for music’s sake again, void of ego and all the extra weighted nuances (politics) that tends to coincide with our position, and pursue the innocence and joy of making music once held as eager children. When we decide to shed the cloak of protection surrounding our souls, we can truly make meaningful connections, and as artists, convey the intended emotion or story people so desperately yearn to feel more in this life.” –D. Elam Dauw, May 2016 Blog
 
I bring up this crucial quote to set the premise for this month’s sentiment. Why do we teach music in our schools? Why is music basic to our civilization and considered a core class? (Goals 2000: Educate America Act, Clinton Administration)
 
From the earliest times in human civilization after music was found to serve purposes in distant tribal communication, it then became the core of many sacred and religious rituals. Later, music became relevant within societal systems for celebration, and by adding crafted, authentic tribal instruments to the manipulation of vocal chants (call) and responses, music was converted into entertainment, cementing itself into the psyche of release. Within a short amount of time, music was referred to as ‘rational medicine,’ playing roles in healing, religious rites, and helping the emotionally disturbed. In the medieval and renaissance periods it served as a remedy for ‘melancholy’ people, or what we know to be depression (and madness) today. Music was prescribed as ‘preventative medicine’ to enhance emotional health. We now know that music releases endorphins, which is the chemical in the brain that tells us we are happy. Current research proves that music is the only activity that activates both the left and right hemisphere of the brain, but not just that, it activates every region and nearly every subsystem, including the limbic system where we process emotions. Music is key to the human experience. 
 
To a related point, you may have used a common phrase with your students or ensembles at one point or another: You get out of something what you put into it. Another version? You reap what you sow - nothing more, nothing less. Might it be possible that ensemble efficacy, alongside the opportunity for students to create meaningful connections through music, is being missed by none other than the director? Is it possible that the reason performances are void of emotive qualities is due to a lack of purposeful creativity?
 
What many directors fail to remember in delivering their curriculum is that music is not simply meant to be performed for scheduled concerts and festivals (a school vaccuum). Our curriculum, whether band, choir, or orchestra, is the vehicle used to teach students the art of humanity and character, and consequently (hopefully) inspires a life-long love and appreciation for music. Sharing music with others is vital to the human experience, but even more important that it serves a purpose for the greater good. Meaningful work begets a meaningful life, and as mentioned in Part 1, we all yearn to feel a sense of childlike wonder and profound connection to that which inspires deep growth in our essence. There is an inherent desire within our souls to be good and do good for others by means of our personality, but we must be given the choice. Of course students enjoy performing for family and friends at concerts; however, we are missing the bulls eye completely when not providing students an authentically empowered and intrinsic emotional experience by sharing our music in performance with those who may need it most in this world.

​I challenge you today to step outside your comfort zone of planning your routine performances, trips, and rehearsals, and make time for service learning. Whether a performance at a nearby children’s hospital, an assisted living or retirement facility, a bank, a bookstore, or local school for the blind, anything and everything to enable personal growth through selfless acts is of utmost value to the development of our students in creating newfound human connections. The difference between community service and service learning is that the students create these options for growth, and ultimately, they come up with a project, assist in the planning process, and then end with reflection to evaluate what they might do better next time and what they learned about themselves and as a team by completing the project. It’s a win-win philosophy of enabling a dynamic of love, generosity, and kindness within your ensemble, and one that will set the stage for human growth and emotive, honest music-making. A sense of reverence and peace for their individual gifts will be the end result, propelling their desire to continue making musical connections with others throughout their lifetime. 
​
#music #musicians #musiceducators #soulfulmusicianship #musicservicelearning

​​At present, five books are rotating through my hands in a given summer week, some new and others old. One previously read selection called The Seat of the Soul never tires for me, and continues to broaden my state of awareness and personal evolution on this planet. As I reach the given relevance of said book, allow me to first divulge some personal journal writing to set up my point for July:

When I was a child, I yearned to understand my own path in this life. I was in awe of the Earth, moon, sun, flowers, the wind blowing through the trees – and I took in every movement as a sign of what was to come. I would lie on the grass and beseech the skies for answers to questions using my inner voice: Will I find true love? Will I be happy? I found it miraculous when the wind would then blow harder through the trees, or a cloud changed shape as it drifted by in response. Did God just answer my question? I searched for meaning in every detail. In my mind, I would contemplate actions of others and visualize my response, or concoct a potential future filled with various imaginative scenarios. It was and still is in these times of deep intuition that I have become a part of my being, and of my soul. Whether stubbornly hopeful, or curiously delusional in personality, I tend to think (and over think), question (and over question), and feel as if I may be a vessel for other great things in this life yet to be determined.

​When we are young, we are stubbornly curious to explore our five senses, and as children, I believe our extended senses allow us to create a unique world based on our personalities. We hunger for knowledge, to emulate our elders, to be heroes, to live a life catered to our own curiosity, but then something happens: Fear.
 
“Each choice of fear – anger, jealousy, vengefulness – is a choice to evolve unconsciously through the painful, destructive consequences that fear creates.” –Gary Zukav, The Seat of the Soul
 
Fear is a learned behavior in childhood. Some fear is of utmost value and quality, created to protect us from a hot stove, a busy intersection, falling down stairs, or evading strangers. It is the learned non-quality fears, however, creating the exact same feeling of angst, at a catastrophic detriment to the souls of our children into adulthood. Examples include fearing those in diverse economic statuses, fearing other races, fear of the police, fearing other religions, fear of power (or having no power), fearing the elderly or people who look different, fear of politicians; and ultimately, fear of anything we might lose, like a sporting event, money, a home, a car, our body, our mind, our beliefs, and even love.
 
The misconception that teaching fear, whether directly or indirectly (intended or unintended), is of greater consequence or value than instilling a love of self in our children is truly disheartening, and ultimately responsible for a lack of soulful children who will later need to learn how to unmask their vulnerability in this world in order to truly love. Why would we (and shamefully how could we) knowingly place our children in a position to later shed all these overwhelming, learned fears? Instead, let us embrace the innocence of their questioning, and allow them to fill in the gaps by asking their thoughts on a subject. Avoid suggesting your own ideas by enabling them to engage their own intelligences, their own intuitions, and their own beliefs, thereby creating a higher level of consciousness, wonder, and beauty within their souls. 

“Our deeper understanding leads us to another kind of power, a power that loves life in every form that appears, a power that does not judge what it encounters, a power that perceives meaningfulness and purpose in the smallest details upon the Earth. This is authentic power. When we align our thoughts, emotions, and actions with the highest part of ourselves, we are filled with enthusiasm, purpose, and meaning. Life is rich and full. We are joyously and intimately engaged with our world. This is the experience of authentic power.” –Gary Zukav (p. 11), The Seat of the Soul
 
Admittedly, I was not as comfortable with elders as a child (relatives excluded), and certainly a majority of adults would state the same upon reflection. Due to the community involvement encouraged by both my high school choir director and my mother, I not only shed all traces of fear after exposure performing for assisted living facilities as a teenager, but flourished. It is this same sense of eager enlightenment that provides that childlike feeling of wonder each time I am able to now perform for the elderly, give a lecture about the power of music, or teach my students how to make meaningful connections through the vehicle of music.
 
“Each choice of love – gratitude, patience, appreciation – is a choice to evolve consciously through the healthy, constructive consequences that love creates...  Why not choose the conscious path, the path of joy? Why not journey consciously to the seat of your soul, that place where you transform energy into matter with your intentions – infuse your world with love and live there?... All roads lead to home." –Gary Zukav, The Seat of the Soul
 
Calming peace and at home – that is where we want our children making and performing music; moreover, it is where every musician should be making music! Please return in August to find out how to create deeper, more soulful musical connections with your students through performance via service learning.
#musiceducation #musicians #soulfulmusicianship

​This month’s blog will be brief, in order to emphasize current data as we recognize Alzheimer’s and Brain Awareness Month in June. Below you will find 4 videos between 2013 and 2016, reflecting the Alzheimer’s Association’s yearly endeavor to spread awareness by publishing current facts and figures. If you start with 2013 and jump immediately to 2016, you will find how drastically altered the numbers are within just a 4 year span of time. For example, the cost to our nation for Alzheimer’s (and other forms of dementia) went up 33 billion in just 4 years time, and by 2030, over 76 million baby boomers will be at risk.
 
As mentioned in previous blogs, one of the reasons federal and National Institute of Health (NIH) funding for this disease still falls short is due to the disclosure percentage. We know there are hundreds of thousands out there with dementia, and they are not only missing a proper diagnosis (only 45% disclosure rate v cancer at 90%), but we also have cause of death reports labeled as cardiac arrest for these patients, instead of organ failure caused by Alzheimer’s Disease (hospital ERs lack background files for confirmation). Therefore, our nation’s top neurologists and Alzheimer’s experts have deduced and believe that this disease is the 3rd leading cause of death, as opposed to 6th as reported. This is the only disease among the top 10 that cannot be cured, slowed down, or prevented scientifically in any way. 

What can we do? We need to talk about it, and we need to seek a diagnosis no matter how hard it is to get our loved ones into the doctor. Unfortunately, due to the shortage of neurologists and geriatricians qualified to diagnose Alzheimer’s, it is even more difficult to attain an appointment than ever before, and it will continue to be a problem as numbers skyrocket. From personal shared experiences, patients are waiting 6 months to a year on average to be seen by a qualified doctor. Even then, the blood tests, biochemical biomarkers, brain imaging like MRIs and PET scans (magnetic resonance imaging and positron-emission tomography), neuropsychology tests and clinical interviews – all these items can be used to test into 1 of 7 stages. It can be overwhelming, but that’s why we have the Alzheimer’s Association providing their gracious support at 1-800-272-3900 and www.alz.org
 
Finally, one of the best things you can do is donate information if you are a descendant of someone with Alzheimer’s. Please consider looking into contributing in this way through TrialMatch. People sometimes assume undergoing genetic testing means you want to find out if you have one of the genes responsible for the disease, but you DO have the option of finding out or not. If preferred, the doctors leave that confidential and at your discretion completely, but the point is that you helped by making your information available to researchers which holds more power than you realize!
 
#EndAlz #Alzheimers 

I have a confession. On behalf of every teacher, I must apologize that despite our innate desire to always be compassionate, sincere, and genuinely heroic in nearly every way, we sometimes miss the boat completely. We are actors. We have to be. We struggle personally, we go through life’s hurdles as anyone else, we bury our nose to hide from the overwhelming emotions invading our psyche, we cry in private worrying for our own children, families, financial concerns, et cetera. And yes, at times we must power our way through the day like emotionless robots, avoiding any scenarios or contact promoting more vulnerability, because honestly, moments exist where one more, open vein seems unbearable. Our penultimate defense mechanism kicks in where we tuck our emotions deep down, put on a smile, and make our way through the day’s lesson plans to enable the nuts and bolts of instruction.
 
Did we ever realize how hard it would be some days to forge through? Did we ever think how the “stuff” of life could affect us at our cores? The list is endless: Loss of a loved one, a sick parent or child, divorce, miscellaneous relationship issues, among others.
 
I believe all educators who are meant to teach are selfless beings. At their very cores, teachers choose this profession for one reason: To inspire. The only problem is that some educators never come to feel the healing power of their profession when personal tragedy clouds thoughts. The saying rings true: Choose a job you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life. When one is in the right profession, our work becomes our daily drug of choice. We feel better in the midst of teaching, we make meaningful connections with students, and we inspire, regardless of our own struggles.
  
And this is where we tend to miss the boat: We miss the opportunity to connect with students who are hiding behind the same societal cloak of academia imposed upon them since a young age. We are all hiding from vulnerability in some way:
 
“There is an explanation for all this, but it is not, I believe, that our students are heedless of soulful matters. In fact, today’s undergraduates are closer to the things of the soul than were students in my generation. Traditional students today (to say nothing of their nontraditional peers), are much more likely than we were to have had profoundly soul-challenging experiences by their late teens or early twenties: divorce, the suicide or murder of an acquaintance or friend, substance abuse as a way of dealing with chaos and despair, grim prospects for future employment, and so on.
 
So why do they resist addressing spiritual issues in the classroom? First, our students are told from an early age that school is not the place to bring their questions of meaning: take them home, to your religious community, or to your therapist, but do not bring them to school. So students learn, as a matter of survival, to keep their hearts hidden when in the groves of academe. It is no wonder that they become distrustful, even frightened, when some teacher suddenly changes the rules and asks them to wear their hearts on their sleeves.
 
But I am equally passionate about not violating the deepest needs of the human soul, which education does with some regularity. I have seen the price we pay for a system of education so fearful of soulful things that it fails to address the real issues of our lives, dispensing data at the expense of meaning, facts at the expense of wisdom. The price is a schooling that alienates and dulls us, that graduates people who have had no mentoring in the questions that both vex and enliven the human spirit, people who are spiritually empty at best and spiritually toxic at worst.
-Parker Palmer, “Teaching with Heart and Soul: Reflections on Spirituality” from Journal of Teacher Education
 
We are failing our students by teaching at them, and not to their inner beings. Similar to how one may hear another speak, but not actively listen, we are choosing to ignore accessing students at their cores. Students are being trained to act, just as we do, to forge through their days as muted, masked, emotionless robots void of any signs of vulnerability.

​What’s the result? Pertaining to the performance of honest music, it is quite simple:
“Hiding behind technical mastery makes musicing’s goal effect rather than truth. Performance and performance preparation that only emphasizes technique can never illuminate the truth – or rather, the inner “soul” of the score.”
–James Jordan, The Musician’s Trust
 
Every music educator has been guilty of focusing on the black and white of the page, rather than the composer’s emotional intent through notation on a piece of paper. As previously stated in past blogs, we are in the business of aesthetics, but it is not solely to relay information – it is to relay an emotion or a story with band, orchestra, or choir as our vehicle. 

​When was the last time you placed a piece in front of your ensemble that had personal meaning for you? My 7th grade ensemble performed Puccini’s “O Mio Babbino Caro” from Gianni Schicci (arranged by Johnnie Vinson) this spring for contest and their spring concert. Our contest performance was excellent, exuding elements of rubato where students were forced to watch intensely for all the conducting nuances of each phrase, but something was missing in the depth of their performance.
 
Because I knew the value of sharing personal stories with my students to create a deeper, honest, more meaningful performance (yes, even as 7th graders), I informed students how the selection had personal meaning to me, and promised to share details before our concert. By the day of our final rehearsal, handfuls of students were requesting my story. They wanted to know, not just because they cared for me as I do them, but because they yearned to understand the why of the performance itself. Why should this matter to me? We all question the why of what we do on a daily basis, especially when someone asks us to follow through; furthermore, students truly want to please teachers who care about their lives.
 
When I shared my personal reasons for the selected piece, many students were crying along with me, having gone through or currently going through a similar experience in their lives. It was a sincere, raw, and visceral moment between me and 58 students that created a beautiful performance that evening for families; one that was answered by many tears in the audience.
 
We simply have to do a better job speaking to our students, learning who they are at their cores, and genuinely care more about their progress as young people. We must stop hiding from our own stories and choose to share the vulnerability that makes us all human beings. All musicians and directors should try to perform music for music’s sake again, void of ego and all the extra weighted nuances (politics) that tends to coincide with our position, and pursue the innocence and joy of making music once held as eager children. When we decide to shed the cloak of protection surrounding our souls, we can truly make meaningful connections, and as artists, convey the intended emotion or story people so desperately yearn to feel more in this life. 

#musicians #educators #musiceducators

​​In honor of the two-year anniversary of my monthly blog, I’d like to re-publish the very first entry documenting the exact moment my life changed forever, and launched me into this wonderful world of research, volunteering, speaking, and fiction writing. I hope you enjoy this narrative story if it’s your first time reading! 

“Grandma?” I gracefully cross the tile floor, attempting to make amity with the still and quiet space to approach her hospital bed. She rests peacefully on her right side, a rolling tray of hydration and miscellaneous patient essentials before her face. To avoid disturbing the layout of the room, I opt for sitting on the edge of the bed near her feet with one leg propped on the mattress. I stare at the petite, frail frame of my grandmother. Moments pass while taking in the sight of her body with deteriorating bones, compromised by malnutrition from pneumonia and an infected bedsore. 

“Grandma?” I manage to squeak out. 

My lower lip quivers slightly while remembering this vibrant woman from my childhood, where visits to her home included observations of productive task completion accompanied by constant singing or whistling. Watching her vivaciously fly around the large house was entertaining in itself. No amount of toys, books, or television shows could lure me away from listening to the sound of her voice as she cleaned, cooked, and laundered clothes; the soprano timbre had a lyrically quick and pleasant vibrato. After she completed the day’s chores, she sat down on the piano bench to play and sing through her favorites hymns. I watched her hands in awe, wishing I could one day master those black and ivory keys with as much ease and passion. I stood by her side, waiting to request my favorite tune, Alley Cat; she never needed to ask my preference but always did regardless. 

“Grandma Sarah?” My hand hesitates while reaching out to touch her hip, not wishing to cause further pain to the sensitive lower back sore where a pillow props her weight. Instead I reach higher and gently rub her bicep. “Grandma?”

Nothing. 

Stroking her arm, I lean forward to see the purple bruises from the onslaught of intravenous needles during the hospital stay. A welling of tears run over the brim of my lids and down my cheeks as I continue patting her arm.  I test the weight of my hands over several minutes, waiting for her to awake upon my touch. 

No response. 

My heart sinks in my chest. The amazing woman before me had a beautiful life she could no longer remember. From U.S. Cadet Corps nurse, to labor and delivery nurse, to school nurse while raising four children, she spent her entire life taking care of others. Her Alzheimer’s diagnosis came after months of rapid deterioration in functional skills, and nine years later she still suffered. I owe much of my success as a music educator to this phenomenal woman. Her passion for music was tangible throughout her life, which transferred to my mother and down to me. What could I do to possibly repay the euphoria of my world as a happy band director? 

Unable to draw a response both verbally and in physical touch, I open my mouth to an old melody: 
           “Meet me tonight in Dreamland, under the silv’ry moon, 
           meet me tonight in Dreamland, where love’s sweet roses bloom. 
           Come with the love light gleaming, in your dear eyes of blue, 
           meet me in Dreamland, sweet, dreamy dreamland, 
           there let my dreams come true.” 

Mimicking the tone color of the recording sung by Judy Garland, I heard the ballad countless times in my youth. It never aged for me, nor grew tired in the sensory follicles of my ears. 

Gazing out the window over my shoulder, I opt to sing through the tune again at an increased volume, feeling comfortable in solitude with the acoustics of the room. Midway through the second line, I see slight movement in my periphery. Stunned to near silence, my voice wavers but I do not stop singing. Her left shoulder leans back toward the mattress slowly, then her head tilts to the sound of my voice. The aged lines of her pale face come into view just as her eyes subtly crease to reveal the sapphire irises.  Her left hand gently lands on the mattress before I take hold and caress the backside with my thumb, making soothing circles. The wrinkle in her forehead indicates an attempt to bring my face into focus without her glasses and a genuine effort to recall who is singing at her bedside. 

I finish the last line of the song, “Hi, Grandma. It’s Denise, your granddaughter.” I massage her hand in both of my own, but she does not respond. Unwilling to let the opportunity to experiment pass, I decide on an upbeat melody she repeatedly sang to all her grandchildren in our youth:
           “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine,
            you make me happy when skies are gray,
            you’ll never know dear, how much I love you,
            please don’t take my sunshine away.”

While continuing the folk song into the second verse, my disposition falters to tears once again witnessing one of the greatest affirmations of my entire existence: my grandmother was attempting to murmur the lyrics! The singing continued for over an hour as I superseded the emotions and revelation shaping itself in my mind.  Every song presented was relevant to her upbringing, from The Andrew Sisters to Frank Sinatra, and Bing Crosby, yet mixed with several of her favorite hymns. 

In all my music training, I never before realized a response could be as overwhelmingly prominent in a dementia patient. The epiphany of this event equally angered as it did inspire. How could I have missed this in all those years of study? What is it that causes this intense reaction? I preach the power of music to my students every day, but never before grasped its innate ability to bring one back to lucidity, if only for moments. 

As any optimist would resolve, I poured my efforts into action by analyzing current research. It is there I found my answers: The last portion of the brain consumed by Alzheimer’s Disease is the medial prefrontal cortex where autobiographical information can be retrieved when familiar music is presented. This region has the power to bridge connections with emotions felt from those memories, creating an overwhelming response in patients. Findings from studies within the last five years alone have sparked current trends in music therapy plans, such as mp3 and iPod playlists full of tunes specific to each individual. Care givers and researchers alike are seeing results.  

Music is powerful. Our mind yearns for the emotions associated with each varying canvas of notes and rhythms, as well as the unique way it heals. As I witnessed with my grandmother only six months before her passing in 2010, music is the food of love as a true gateway to lucidity. Therefore, it is my plea, along with thousands of music educators across the world, that we continue traditions of music excellence in our schools and within our homes to ensure connections to our families, their thoughts, and their minds until the end of natural life.